What I Say: Hey, do me a favor and let me know the next time a realtor is showing the apartment? 

What I Assume My Mother Hears, To Judge By Her Reaction: I have lately taken to having loud and energetic sexual relations with a significant portion of the animal population of southeastern Australia. I have told all of your friends about this predilection of mine, and they wish to know what you did wrong to bring about my current depraved state. You may scream incoherently, now.

I WANT TO KNOW WHAT TRANSLATION SOFTWARE SHE IS USING.